September 1, 2008
Adventures in Guyland
An article on msn caught my attention today. It featured Michael Kimmel the author of the book Guyland and brought up the topic concerning how today’s young men are frequently trapped between boyhood and adulthood. The title of the article itself was Boys to Men: Why guys aren’t growing up. As you can guess, the article pretty much pointed fingers at everyone who writes or even reads the content of this site. But before we get too defensive, let’s talk about some of the trends that the article addressed.
In your own experience, does there seem to be a growing trend of career aimlessness, videogame induced non-productivity, binge drinking, girl bashing, and continued dorm-esque lifestyles among our post-college male population? Is there an increase of hook-ups over meaningful relationships? Is it more difficult for guys to break away from their college and high school buddies than it was for our fathers before us? Michael Kimmel would certainly say yes.
To be honest, I’m somewhat inclined to say yes as well. Technology naturally plays a role. Facebook and instant messenger for example, make it much simpler for your everyday schmoe to keep in touch with old friends. Videogames likewise have become cultural pastime catering to a very specific male demographic (Even despite the admirable efforts of the Nintendo’s Wii). And today’s mass communication allows for and promotes the heavy flow and production of pornography and sports discourse across a variety of media. And though I’ve never really discovered the appeal of popular sports, I do find myself guilty of living vicariously through characters found in action flicks more often than I spend time mapping out my future. I for one, even admit to maintaining a conscious resistance to the thought of becoming a full-fledged adult.
Michael Kimmel writes…
“In this topsy-turvy, Peter-Pan mindset, young men shirk the responsibilities of adulthood and remain fixated on the trappings of boyhood, while the boys they still are struggle heroically to prove that they are real men despite all evidence to the contrary”
I’m hesitant to agree that such trends will bring about the fall of mankind, but at the same time I do recognize some valid points. Basically instead of putting in the effort of producing my own opinion, I’m going to leave that to you readers. So what do you think? Are these observations and claims accurate? Or are these notions simply the rants of an aging (and balding) man who belongs to a generation that will never understand Nirvana, has a skewed view of video games, and basically repeats (in different terminology) what every previous generation says about the one after them? I’ll be in my room watching porn.
Meh, I have mixed feelings on the subject. While I do agree that there are plenty of people from our generation who refuse to grow up, and who are irresponsible beyond reason, I’m not convinced our parents’ generation was that much different. What I do find interesting is how quickly our parents’ generation will condemn ours as wrong, as if they had it all figured out. Hey, if you had it all figured out, why are your kids so messed up? Maybe you didn’t have it all figured out after all.
As for myself, me and most of my college friends have career jobs, are in good financial standing, and have pretty steady relationships. If I look at the people I went to high school with who didn’t go to college though, they seem to be doing temp jobs, and just waiting to get done so they can open up a case of beer.
Also, as far as the promiscuity goes, I think there’s a valid explanation there too. The women in our parents’ generation were expected to get through high school and immediately pursue a family. Their expectation was to be a mother/housewife. Now more and more women are working in career jobs, and are holding off on the family thing until they’re in their 30s. Now of course if girls are waiting 10-15 more years to get married they’re going to have more pre-marital sex.
All in all, I think this guy is just angry that the TV was a better father to his kids then he ever was, and instead of realizing the downfalls of his own inadequacies he’s going to blame it on us. Well TOO BAD Mr. Kimmel, you’re not getting a freebie on this one. Just because our generation knows how to work hard at their 9-5 and still have fun after that, doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
Comment by Tristan — September 1, 2008 @ 1:50 pm