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July 28, 2008

Hollywood, We’re on to you.

Dear Hollywood,

I write this letter to you as a warning, a shot across your bow as it were. I bring these matters to your attention for your own good. I know you’d like us all to believe that you are thriving, but we all know it to be false.

No?

A new Terminator? Honestly. And how many movies based on comic books have come out in the past year ? I count at least 7. More than one every other month. But I digress. This is not why I fire shots across your bow.

Special Effects.

Roll back the clock approximately 113,880 hours to 1995 when the first Jurassic Park came out. Recall that movie for a moment. That T-Rex chasing a jeep through the night? That dinosaur was completely CG, but there was something about it that just made it so believable. Like they actually spent time on it and didn’t just hustle it out the door. Fast-forward 52,560 hours to 2001. Jurassic Park III has just come out and it is a CG nightmare. Not only was the movie itself of lesser quality plot wise, but instead of CG playing a supporting role, it was elevated to lead in the form of Spinosaurus. Lead role is, unfortunately, a place where I believe CG is a little uncomfortable.

Enough beating around the bush… CG should only be used to supplement, not replace real special effects. Hollywood, you have more money than brains, therefore I propose to you these 7 Tenets of Special Effects:

  1. Blow things up.
  2. Supplement real action with CG.
  3. Use your vast resources.
  4. Do it better than the AV nerds at home.
  5. Do something we haven’t seen before, but don’t cop out to CG.
  6. CG for movies like Transformers is OK.
  7. For the love of god reduce the number of people in the damn credits.

The value of CG has plummeted. It was a neat trick, but we all know it now. If something looks impossible, CG is the obvious answer. Change that. Rebuild your credibility. Do real effects. Tell the critics. Tell the media. Tell your fans. For the love of movies and the good of movies worldwide.

Besides, the hardest and quite possibly the coolest car stunt of all time was completed in 1974, and has yet to be repeated.

Do us proud.

Regards,

-Travis

Filed by Travis on July 28th, 2008

The entire time I was watching that YouTube clip the voices in my head were screaming “Do a barrel roll!”

Comment by Tristan — July 28, 2008 @ 8:56 am

Dear Travis,

We redognize your concerns and critisisms as valid and insightful. However at this current point, we are not looking to downsize our CG departments and the Terminator sequel will premier on schedule. The good news is that we are willing to cut a deal with you. We agree to heed each and every one of your pieces of advice just as soon as people stop attending our movies and in turn, financing our extravagant lifestyles our here on the west coast.

Sincerely,

Hollywood

Comment by Will — July 28, 2008 @ 9:47 am

Dear Hollywood,

Go suck it. You’re all lame.

Smooches,
Travis

Comment by Travis — July 28, 2008 @ 10:49 am

Didn’t The Dark Knight use primarily real stunts for all their stuff? I feel like Nolan tends to be one who goes lightly on the CGI, when he can…

Comment by Tom — July 28, 2008 @ 8:19 pm

Yeah, The Dark Knight was pretty CG bare, compared to the Spider-man movies or anything Will Smith has ever been in. I totally agree with this. I worried if they ever do make a new Ghostbusters they will ruin it with CG… my dreams… sigh

Comment by HP — July 28, 2008 @ 8:24 pm

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